Domestic Violence Awareness - Blog

Domestic Violence Awareness-Blog talks about the so-called Domestic Violence Cycle -Domestic Violence Awareness is never enough to stop that brutal cycle.  

The Domestic Violence Cycle which generally has three phases:

1. Increased tension: The tensions accumulated in everyday life, the injuries and threats caused by the aggressor impact the victim and cause a sense of imminent danger.

2. violent attack: the aggressor mistreats the victim physically and psychologically; These mistreatments tend to escalate in frequency and intensity.

3. Honeymoon: The abuser now engages the victim with affection and attention, apologizing for the aggression and promising to change (he will never again engage in violence). 

This cycle is characterized by its continuity in time, that is, by its repeated repetition over months or years, and the phases of tension and appeasement may be increasingly smaller and the period of violent attack increasingly intense. Usually, this pattern of interaction ends where it first began. In limit situations, the culmination of these episodes could be murder. Domestic violence a pattern of behaviour by which a partner, boyfriend/girlfriend husband/wife, girlfriend/boyfriend or sometimes even former partner uses any type of abuse such as physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse and/or financial abuse. It is a crime that affects thousands of people regardless of age, economic status, race, immigration status or sexual orientation. Victims often feel fear, feelings of dependence and/or insecurity. And the children of the victims will face these same realities.

                                  

Types of Abuse Physical Emotional Abuse / Psychological Abuse Economic Stalking and Harassment Sexual Abuse With All The Domestic Violence Awareness In The World, We Are Still Powerless To Protect Victims.

Violence against women a complex and multidimensional phenomenon, that cuts across social classes, ages and regions, and has featured reactions of non-reaction and passivity on the part of women, seeking them to find straightforward and/or conformist solutions. There was a great reluctance to bring this type of conflict into the public space, where it has long been silenced. Each woman's reaction to her victimization situation is unique. These reactions should be viewed as psychological survival mechanisms that each act differently to support the victimization. Many women do not consider the mistreatment to which they are subjected, abduction, harm, injury, defamation or sexual coercion and rape by spouses or partners as crimes. But it is a crime, it is a big crime, and we need more domestic violence awareness in the world, we need to help more, we need to educate people out there. And that is the reason that I have created The  

THE CHILDREN GROWING UP WITH DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

Children may be considered victims of domestic violence as:

• witnesses to domestic violence: This includes witnessing or hearing abuses inflicted on the victim, seeing physical signs after episodes of violence or witnessing the consequences of this violence on the abused person;
• tools of abuse: An offending parent may use their children as a form of abuse and control;
• Victims of abuse: Children may be physically and/or emotionally abused by the perpetrator (or even, in some cases, by the victim himself).

If you have children, just try to remember that if you tolerate domestic violence not only you putting your life a risk you are risking your children lives too. Not only that, you are teaching them that is ok to tolerate it, so your daughter can grow up to allow herself to be a "victim" because she has seen you accept that name and your son could grow up to be the abuser because of what he has seen at home. Because he will grow up believing that is ok since you allowed that behaviour to go on at your home, near your children. Stop the vicious circle, teach your kids that it's not ok to live like that. Teach what is right and wrong and trust me; there is nothing right about domestic violence, nothing at all. Your children deserve better, YOU DESERVE BETTER.

ARE YOU BEING A VICTIM?

Some issues can help you understand if you are a victim of domestic violence, such as:  

1. Are you scared of your boyfriend or girlfriend's temper?
2. Are you afraid of his reaction when you don't have the same opinion?
3. Does he/she continually ignore your feelings?
4. Do you enjoy the things you say?
5. Are you trying to ridicule him or make him feel bad in front of his friends or others?
6. Has he/she ever threatened to harm you?
7. Has he/she ever hit you, kicked, pushed or thrown you with an object?
8. Can't you be with your friends and family because he's jealous?
9. Have you ever been forced to have sex?
10. Are you afraid to say no when you don't want to have sex?
11. Are you forced to justify everything you do?
12. Is he/she continually threatening to reveal your relationship?
13. Have you been wrongly accused of being involved in or having sex with others?
14. Whenever you want to go out, do you have to ask permission?

 

Now let me tell you a story about a beautiful girl that Unfortunately didn't survive Domestic Violence.

Jessica Casalvera

I guess some people possess that magic which remains behind even after they leave, I'm hoping Jessica's story touches somebody that needs to be encouraged to get help. I only found out about Jessica's story because her mom left a comment on my other Domestic Violence article. Now both her mum and her dad are my facebook friends. I have massive respect for them, I respect the pain of loss they live with. I asked to write about her, and her mum has given me permission to do so. Cases like Jessica's should be all over the news. People should be aware of how lethal Domestic Violence really is!

A lot of people read about these cases and assume it wouldn't happen to them, but it can! If you happen to question Jessica's parents Kathy Yates Yetter and Travis Yetter, I'm positive that under no circumstances they thought Domestic Violence would be likely to take away their own wonderful girl, but it did! She was just 20-year-old

Jessica Casalvera was indeed shot and murdered by her ex-boyfriend, 18-year-old Ramiro Benitez. Right after the shooting, police stated he then turned the gun on himself. Jessica Casalvera was born on April 13, 1989, in Newark, Delaware. Such a brief life for Jessica, she was and always will be loved by her family and her friends. Her brothers Eric, Nathan, Travis 10 and sister Katie have lost their dearly loved sister to Domestic Violence. Jessica was a marvellous daughter and sister, as well as a good friend to everyone that knew her. Her loved ones say she never failed to put a smile on their face with her excellent sense of humour. Jessica was taken away from her loving family on March 23, 2010, in the act of domestic violence. She will always be without a doubt missed by each and everyone that knew her.

 

 

 Jessica's family continues to honour her by educating people about domestic violence and also joining Child Inc. of Delaware in their efforts to protect victims of domestic violence. Jessica has been an inspiration to everyone that knew her. For that reason allow Jessica to become an inspiration for you as well, If you are actually struggling with domestic violence, please take that one particular step Jessica attempted for so long. Unfortunately, Jessica didn't make it, but you still can!!!!! Leave and never go look back. Jessica Casalvera, who was killed in Middletown, Delaware. 

Jess loved life. She was murdered just 3 weeks before her 21st birthday. She was getting ready to start a new job and get her re-certification in cosmetology. She wanted to meet a nice man who treated her with kindness and respect, eventually, marry and have several children. She loved family dearly and just wanted one of her own. This Is How Jessica's Domestic Violence Story Ended Please Don't Let The Same Happen To You. RIP Beautiful Jessica!

Middletown Woman's Fatal Relationship Sends Universal Message Jessica Casalvera. This Is Her Story A video from Jessica's mum Kathy Yates

Domestic Violence Awareness - Blog Video

What is physical abuse? Someone pushes you Someone slaps you or punch you. Someone strangles you. Someone you with something, shoes, golf clubs, rugby clubs, hammers or belts.   Someone smashes things near you to cause you to fear. You get knives involved or pieces of broken glass on the floor. Someone throws even a light item like a cloth or a T-shirt at you. Somone gag you when you want to scream, during the physical confrontation.  Someone spit or pee on you. Someone beat you severely, pulling your hair. Someone Shouts so loud that you feel scared.  

Where To Seek Help

In an emergency, call The 24hr freephone National Domestic Violence Helpline (run in partnership between Women's Aid and Refuge) is available on 0808 2000 247 hours a day, 7 days a week. Before you call   Be sure that you are safe when you call the helpline. If you can use a public phone just in case, your partner that is causing the abuse is monitoring your calls or the phone you will be using. Be safe!